Tuesday, December 25, 2012
When the song is over…
There are many instances when you become happy for no freaking reason; also you are depressed when there’s nothing wrong. I had gone through a phase when everything I did was so bloody wrong, I was losing the purpose of my own existence, but I really feel happy that I’ve got a bunch of friends who make me realize that I am not a normal person and I am not meant to be one or lead a life similar to it. I can be a total drama-queen and be a tough contender to other girls, but I still lack that substance of dramatic aura. They said that I was a super-human (like the ones they show on discovery channel) and tried to console my desolated mind.
Everything said and done, I was still an unemployed sack of junk in my home and all I did was going to the lake in the twilight hours for an hour for a photographic healing. The lake looked like a bride every evening and I was like an uninvited guest to the celestial wedding. The view pleased me more than any other stress-relief medicines and it treated me well. I was delusional for a while and was moving on a different path altogether, but as I said, friends save your ass out of every freaking problem. You may tend to fall in love with money and gauge success even before you started the journey; you may tend to go underground and disconnect yourself from the outer world; there are many such foolish ideas that passed my mind and died within. I came to know one thing that, when you choose to stay aloof, you are not available even to your own self. Now that the days of cribbing about past has gone, and I have good things to talk about, I am back on track and here to share everything that I missed out.
The good thing is, I am back to the world of my dreams (in real) and it is time I start living it for a long time now. Every song has a prelude and interlude and so is this life. The composition of the song is more important than the instruments. When such is life, there’s a melody even in the narration of the poetry. You waltz in the air with your dream-girl and write a ballad for her. The only thought you’ll have further is to marry a girl with sweet lips and big hips, settle in your hometown, get rich and have kids. There is no end to a man’s desire, but when he is happy, he never minds dreaming big. For instance, I was thinking, I’ll settle in Mumbai and after 2-3 years I’ll get married, though Mumbai is not my hometown I believe I’ll fall in love with that place whatsoever. It maybe a blind belief, but I haven’t given a second thought about it as of now. The only concern I have is about the girl whom I’ll marry. Though I come from a family that believes in “Arranged marriages are the best”, I have the same opinion, provided all the arrangements happen according to me. I’ve displayed a very desperate image of myself these days, but that is the truth.
Nobody on this earth would like to die unused. If I have something best in me to offer, I’ll surely find someone who’ll fill that space up for me, because where there’s a ditch, there’s a spade. My parents keep yapping me about my unusual “creative” job and tell that I won’t get any girl if I act so weird and behave like a freak. Of course, I’ll not get a girl who’s of their choice and who loves being in a ‘sardine tin’. Just like I got an unusual job that I love a lot, I’ll get an unusual girl too. Maybe she won’t be a demi-goddess and possess superpowers to understand me silently, but definitely she’ll know the bitchy side of my life and try to kick me in the balls every time I failed to be myself. This is how I wish my life to be and I hope it will be as awesome as it was when I lived my life like a cloud; going with the flow; shady when it’s dark; pouring when heavy; and clear when sunny.